What's your favorite holiday? It's one of those questions that, if you actually manage to garner a real conversation out of it can really tell you quite a bit about a person. Seriously, you'd be surprised. It's every bit as good as a list of Top 5 Songs to hear on a Monday morning, and you only have to come up with one answer. Not 5. Super easy.
My favorite is definitely Thanksgiving. Now, I know what you're all thinking ("of course it is Craig -- you love everything about food, and that's what this is all about"). But you'd be wrong. The real reason I love Thanksgiving is because it's the only holiday that's really entirely about the people you get to spend it with.
Here's the way I see it. All holidays are about something. That's why we have them. If they weren't about something, they'd just be regular days (and we wouldn't get to yell at people at the airports because everyone else there is slowing you down and getting in your way on your trip home). Some holidays are secular. Think Fourth of July (or "Independence Day" since everyone has a 4th of July, built right into the calendar). Independence Day is supposedly about the day America claimed its independence from England and started our own country. (It's really about fireworks, barbeques, and Randy Quaid flying his crop duster into the belly of an alien spacecraft) Other holidays are spiritual. I'll go ahead and use Christmas and Easter as examples, which we all know are about presents, eggnog, candy and Jesus (but mostly presents, eggnog, and candy...sorry Jesus, just calling it like I see it -- we have $600 Christmas trees now that stand upside down so there's more room for presents under them -- http://www.usatoday.com/life/lifestyle/2005-11-07-christmas-trees_x.htm). Some holidays are egocentric, like New Year's Eve (trust me, you didn't keep your resolution last year, and you're not keeping it this year -- stop patting yourself on the back acting like you'll be a better person next year, because at the end, you'll still be a shmuck) Still other holidays are fake (see valentine's day, arbor day, take your daughter to work day, and national grilled cheese awareness day).
Thanksgiving clearly falls into the secular category. But what's Thanksgiving about? If I wanted to be cynical, (and when don't I?) I'd say it's a rememberance of the day the Pilgrims gorged themselves on the Native Americans' food in order to store calories for the highly demanding systematic slaughter which they were about to undertake (for which we Americans are supposed to be thankful).
But other than that, where does Thanksgiving come from? Well, in 1789 George Washington (POTHUSA 1) declared a "National Day of Thankgiving" which Thomas Jefferson (POTUSA 2) declared was a "crappy idea." Then along came Honest Abe Lincoln (POTUSA 16) who fought a very civil war to free the slaves and then named the last Thursday in November a National day of Thanksgiving after 40 years of nagging by various women's magazine who wanted another reason to spend a long day in the kitchen. After 78 years of debating on what the date should be (in order to provide the required amount of shopping time before Christmas, which is about the presents), Congress declared that the fourth Thursday in November to be Thanksgiving. (paraphrased from http://wilstar.com/holidays/thankstr.htm)
So that's it. That's what Thanksgiving is about. It's about presidents that disagree with each other's policies, and freeing slaves, and women doign what women do best (nagging and cooking), and Congress deliberating for 80 years to make a decision, and preparing for Christmas. So mostly, it's about people. For better or for worse. These are the people we live with and deal with on a daily basis. Sometimes they may be annoying, but it's what we've got, so we may as well enjoy them and be thankful to have them. 'Cause if we didn't have all these people, then we'd be stranded on a desserted island like Tom Hanks in that movie with the volleyball, and then we'd come home and Helen Hunt would have married someone else, and that's just no good. (though the "If you and I were standed on a desserted island, would you...?" line of questioning is also a good way to get to know people -- perhaps better than the holiday question depending on your desired outcome) So be thankful for the friends and the family and the loved ones that God has blessed you with. These are some pretty awesome people, when it comes right down to it, and you should tell them that you're glad to have them around at least once a year.
And that's why I love Thanksgiving. It's a holiday all about the people in your life (and it's a chance to tell them how much they mean to you without having to spend too much money). So here's my part...if you've read this, thank you. It means a lot. I love you. Yes, you. Seriously. THANKS(giving)!
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Saturday, November 19, 2005
My Football Fantasy
Fantasy (n): the power or process of creating especially unrealistic or improbable mental images in response to psychological need. (www.m-w.com)
Fantasy football (n): a football competition with imaginary teams which the participants own, manage, and coach and with the games based on statistics generated by actual players or teams of a professional sport (www.dictionary.com)
Professional (adj): characterized by or conforming to the technical or ethical standards of a profession (www.m-w.com)
Which brings us to the topic of the week: Terrell Owens.
I find it incredible how far out of their way sports personalities have been willing to go in the past week in order to add their two cents to the recent TO drama (the verbal assault on the eagles organization and his coach and his quarterback, followed by his physical assault on a teammate, followed by his suspension, followed by his surprise that his actions warranted a suspension). Honestly folks, I'm tired of hearing about it. The only football "fantasy" I have is that we can actually talk about football, and the guys who are actually on the field playing it, instead of some idiot who's no longer on the team (but like the definition says, that's unrealistice). It disgusts me that "the media" is so wrapped up in this "story" that they can't let it rest for thirty minutes without bringing up those wretched letters. No one has anything original to say or any new information to add that will help us to understand the enigma that is Terrell Owens. We've heard the same exact remarks coming out of every single on air sports commentator that has found him or herself within shouting distance of a microphone. In case you've missed it (in which case you've either been in a coma, buried alive, or using the presidential intelligence reports as your only "reliable" news source--and for all of you out there I'm truly sorry) here's the paraphrase:
"Terrell Owens is a jerk. He was a jerk in San Francisco. He was a jerk when they tried to trade him to Baltimore. He was a jerk when he got to Philly. Being a jerk is the reason he was told to leave Philly. No one was surprised by this (no, not even his audacious agent Drew Rosenhaus-who may well have guaranteed taht no one will ever sign him, or anyone else with the initials DR, or anyone who bobs their head uncontrollably when they talk, as an agent becasue of the way he handled this mess). Terrell Owens was paid to be a professional football player. He acted un-professional-ly. TO got what he deserved. The Eagles are currently getting what they signed up for when they paid for him. Period."
There's nothing else to say, really. Nothing. So don't try. Just move on. Please. Let Terrell disappear from our collective consciousness. We as a culture want nothing to do with him. Don't spend 75% of your pre-game for the Coaches vs Cancer College Basketball Tournament talking about Terrell Owens. Don't use TO talk as your filler in golf coverage. Stop writing articles about it. Don't talk about him on College GameDay, or even on NFL Primetime. And don't don't don't, no matter what, WASTE an entire blog entry on him!
We have more important things to talk about. Let's focus on the positive...after all, it's been one whole year to the day since the last time NBA players climbed into the stands and pummeled some fans. Let's celebrate progress. (And let's wear some nice suits while we do it.)
Fantasy football (n): a football competition with imaginary teams which the participants own, manage, and coach and with the games based on statistics generated by actual players or teams of a professional sport (www.dictionary.com)
Professional (adj): characterized by or conforming to the technical or ethical standards of a profession (www.m-w.com)
Which brings us to the topic of the week: Terrell Owens.
I find it incredible how far out of their way sports personalities have been willing to go in the past week in order to add their two cents to the recent TO drama (the verbal assault on the eagles organization and his coach and his quarterback, followed by his physical assault on a teammate, followed by his suspension, followed by his surprise that his actions warranted a suspension). Honestly folks, I'm tired of hearing about it. The only football "fantasy" I have is that we can actually talk about football, and the guys who are actually on the field playing it, instead of some idiot who's no longer on the team (but like the definition says, that's unrealistice). It disgusts me that "the media" is so wrapped up in this "story" that they can't let it rest for thirty minutes without bringing up those wretched letters. No one has anything original to say or any new information to add that will help us to understand the enigma that is Terrell Owens. We've heard the same exact remarks coming out of every single on air sports commentator that has found him or herself within shouting distance of a microphone. In case you've missed it (in which case you've either been in a coma, buried alive, or using the presidential intelligence reports as your only "reliable" news source--and for all of you out there I'm truly sorry) here's the paraphrase:
"Terrell Owens is a jerk. He was a jerk in San Francisco. He was a jerk when they tried to trade him to Baltimore. He was a jerk when he got to Philly. Being a jerk is the reason he was told to leave Philly. No one was surprised by this (no, not even his audacious agent Drew Rosenhaus-who may well have guaranteed taht no one will ever sign him, or anyone else with the initials DR, or anyone who bobs their head uncontrollably when they talk, as an agent becasue of the way he handled this mess). Terrell Owens was paid to be a professional football player. He acted un-professional-ly. TO got what he deserved. The Eagles are currently getting what they signed up for when they paid for him. Period."
There's nothing else to say, really. Nothing. So don't try. Just move on. Please. Let Terrell disappear from our collective consciousness. We as a culture want nothing to do with him. Don't spend 75% of your pre-game for the Coaches vs Cancer College Basketball Tournament talking about Terrell Owens. Don't use TO talk as your filler in golf coverage. Stop writing articles about it. Don't talk about him on College GameDay, or even on NFL Primetime. And don't don't don't, no matter what, WASTE an entire blog entry on him!
We have more important things to talk about. Let's focus on the positive...after all, it's been one whole year to the day since the last time NBA players climbed into the stands and pummeled some fans. Let's celebrate progress. (And let's wear some nice suits while we do it.)
Sunday, November 13, 2005
Perspectives on Time (Part Deux)
One of my favorite riddles is posed, "You walk 100 yards due south, then turn and walk 100 yards due directly east. You then turn and walk 100 yards directly north. At this point, you find yourself standing in the exact place that you started from. Where are you?"
The answer is "At the north pole," but the riddle brings up a rather interesting point regarding our frame of reference. Typically our understanding of space and time doesn't allow the scenario described in the riddle to hold true. In a classical fram of reference, it makes no sense to be able to leave a point and, making 2 turns and traveling in the cardinal direction, return to the point that you started.
I've often wanted to undertake a study of what I have called "frame of reference physics," in which apparent anomalies such as this one are studied. The reason that I find it so interesting is that our system of measure in terms of both time and global geography are fairly arbitrary, and yet we base our entire understanding of the "laws" of physics on an arbitrary frame of refernce.
(What the hell am I talking about?) All our laws of phsyics are based on time, in terms of seconds, minutes, hours, and days, but these are all arbitrary units. We want to tell ourselves they're not. We say that one day correlates to one rotation of the earth around its axis. This is not the case however. Assuming (for simplicity) that a year consists of 365 days, the earth actually only rotates 364 times, with one full "rotation" being accounted for by the earth's trip around the sun. From this skewed system of "days" we decide to break down 24 hours, into 60 minutes and further 6o seconds. Then we base our understanding of physics and mechanics on this system. Seems arbitrary.
So what types of mysteries will frame of reference (FOR) phsyics study? Well that's simple. First I intend to return to the source of my interest (the north pole) and prove that the reason that Santa is able to deliver all the presents in a single day is that, at the North Pole, all the "time zones" converge, and time as we have created it does not effectively exist. If Santa were to stand at the norht pole, he would not experience earthly time. Further, if he were to leave the pole for a day, he could easily just walk one turn around counterclockwise and earn that day back. It also explains why Santa is able to live forever, without aging.
Off course, since we know that it's always Christmas at the north pole, a corollary to our prior FOR Law would be that at the beginning of time, the initial moment of creation, was in fact Christmas (i.e. t(0)=Christmas). We can then learn that Christmas is not only the birthday of Christ Jesus, but in fact, the birthday of the Universe, which would kinda make sense if you're Christian, and would go a long way in proving that we're right.
Other things to study would be the behavior of light at 2am of daylight savings time, when the clocks change backwards. We would also examine the relationship between the relative speed of earth's rotation (greater at the equator, essentially 0 at the poles) and centrifugal force (which we're told is an imaginary force, but in FOR physics, is very real) to explain why elves live at the pole, and tall people come from Africa. (This is also compounded due to the lesser effect of gravity at the equator dues to the ellipsoid shap of the earth, not pulling as hard on aAfrican people, which also is why white men can't jump...it's gravity's fault) Finally, we'll determine if people living at or near the equator are more likely to get sick due to the drastic temperature changes associated with constantly switching from winter to summer everytime they cross the line.
These are only the beginning, as there are many other scenarios begging to be examined. One day, I would like to examine how math would work with we only had 8 fingers rather than 10, since this is likely the basis of our system. (As a preview, couting would occur, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 20, 21...etc. 5x2=12. and 4 squared= 20.) The rules are the same, but the answers appear different. You would however find that prime numbers occur in the same order, though traditionally 7, 11, 13 becomes 7, 13, 15...these are prime in our new system, which assumes and eight fingered frame of reference (though you may note that in this system we'd still have ten fingers, but the digits 10, would equal eight in our current system and 8 wouldn't exist, just like 10 is not a single digit now)
This is intended to serve as an overview of frame of refence physics. Hopefully this will help to answer some of life's greatest mysteries.
The answer is "At the north pole," but the riddle brings up a rather interesting point regarding our frame of reference. Typically our understanding of space and time doesn't allow the scenario described in the riddle to hold true. In a classical fram of reference, it makes no sense to be able to leave a point and, making 2 turns and traveling in the cardinal direction, return to the point that you started.
I've often wanted to undertake a study of what I have called "frame of reference physics," in which apparent anomalies such as this one are studied. The reason that I find it so interesting is that our system of measure in terms of both time and global geography are fairly arbitrary, and yet we base our entire understanding of the "laws" of physics on an arbitrary frame of refernce.
(What the hell am I talking about?) All our laws of phsyics are based on time, in terms of seconds, minutes, hours, and days, but these are all arbitrary units. We want to tell ourselves they're not. We say that one day correlates to one rotation of the earth around its axis. This is not the case however. Assuming (for simplicity) that a year consists of 365 days, the earth actually only rotates 364 times, with one full "rotation" being accounted for by the earth's trip around the sun. From this skewed system of "days" we decide to break down 24 hours, into 60 minutes and further 6o seconds. Then we base our understanding of physics and mechanics on this system. Seems arbitrary.
So what types of mysteries will frame of reference (FOR) phsyics study? Well that's simple. First I intend to return to the source of my interest (the north pole) and prove that the reason that Santa is able to deliver all the presents in a single day is that, at the North Pole, all the "time zones" converge, and time as we have created it does not effectively exist. If Santa were to stand at the norht pole, he would not experience earthly time. Further, if he were to leave the pole for a day, he could easily just walk one turn around counterclockwise and earn that day back. It also explains why Santa is able to live forever, without aging.
Off course, since we know that it's always Christmas at the north pole, a corollary to our prior FOR Law would be that at the beginning of time, the initial moment of creation, was in fact Christmas (i.e. t(0)=Christmas). We can then learn that Christmas is not only the birthday of Christ Jesus, but in fact, the birthday of the Universe, which would kinda make sense if you're Christian, and would go a long way in proving that we're right.
Other things to study would be the behavior of light at 2am of daylight savings time, when the clocks change backwards. We would also examine the relationship between the relative speed of earth's rotation (greater at the equator, essentially 0 at the poles) and centrifugal force (which we're told is an imaginary force, but in FOR physics, is very real) to explain why elves live at the pole, and tall people come from Africa. (This is also compounded due to the lesser effect of gravity at the equator dues to the ellipsoid shap of the earth, not pulling as hard on aAfrican people, which also is why white men can't jump...it's gravity's fault) Finally, we'll determine if people living at or near the equator are more likely to get sick due to the drastic temperature changes associated with constantly switching from winter to summer everytime they cross the line.
These are only the beginning, as there are many other scenarios begging to be examined. One day, I would like to examine how math would work with we only had 8 fingers rather than 10, since this is likely the basis of our system. (As a preview, couting would occur, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 20, 21...etc. 5x2=12. and 4 squared= 20.) The rules are the same, but the answers appear different. You would however find that prime numbers occur in the same order, though traditionally 7, 11, 13 becomes 7, 13, 15...these are prime in our new system, which assumes and eight fingered frame of reference (though you may note that in this system we'd still have ten fingers, but the digits 10, would equal eight in our current system and 8 wouldn't exist, just like 10 is not a single digit now)
This is intended to serve as an overview of frame of refence physics. Hopefully this will help to answer some of life's greatest mysteries.
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Perspectives on Time
Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to it, but I finally got around to writing the second post regarding the Afterword to Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. Most likely it will end up being less about the book than I had originally intended, but regardless, let's get right down to it:
I've found myself spending quite a bit of time looking back at my past, essentially with the hope for taking a toll on how I've gotten to where I am and see if I can project where it may all lead. The truth is that it's a fairly pointless pursuit, attempting to forecast or predict where you're likely to find yourself in 5 days much less 5 years.
So instead of trying to forecast, I've ended up considering who I am currently. This is where the fun starts. The truth is I realize that I've been a bit depressed. It's hard to pinpoint when exactly it started, but I'm leaning toward the end of my senior year (about a year and a half ago). I've certainly had some ups and downs and quite a few drastic life changes in that time, and have had plenty to think about. The sad truth, which is why I find myself depressed, is that in my estimation I've taken a few giant steps backward in my progression in that year and a half time frame. I have come to believe that I was a better person then than I am currently, and I must admit I find that fact extremely frustrating.
Before I go any farther into this discussion let me say that I don't in any way mean to say that I'm unhappy, or at all dissatisfied with where I am or what I've done to get here. I'm having a great time, really loving the people that I've had the opportunity to get to know and befriend, and for the first time in my life, find myself pursuing an career path that I'm really excited about and that I think is a perfect opportunity for me to link some of the extremely stratified areas of my life into something productive. I think I'm really ready to make a run here, but the past few years have been leading up to all this and that's why I've been doing all the introspection.
So here we are. I'm in a good place, surrounded by good people, enjoying what I'm doing, and really feeling that I'm "in my element" (for lack of a better, less cliche term). So why do I say I'm depressed? Well the answer is really quite simple: in spite of how well I seem to be doing, I really think I could be doing much better, mainly in the way I carry myself as a person.
I've somehow managed to get away from who I am as a person (or more accurately, who I hope to be, since as Bill Parcells puts it "what you are is what you are"). In trying to recall myself 2 years ago, I remember a very different person from the one I see in the mirror now. I seem to recall someone full of life, always positive. Someone who always saw the best in people, and tried to bring that out. Someone who could look his friends in the eye and say "I love you" without hesitation or restraint. Most importantly, I remember being a person who was focused on personal growth and who really brought something positive to his community (in many senses of the word community)--someone who had a whole lot of faith in humanity and gave a lot of trust and respect to the people in his life.
Now I'm a cynic. I've become very negative towards other people, and often find myself frustrated by how "stupid" other people can be. I've become far more sarcastic and biting than I've ever been before. Sometimes now I can't even tell when I'm joking and when I'm not. Instead of seeing the good that people bring to the table, I more and more often find myself fixated on the bad or the negative that I see. Instead of trying to improve myself and the people around me, I'm more likely to make a sarcastic remark and move on.
I've also become arrogant and conceited. I fear that I'm far too proud for my own good; that my pride has become a stumbling block that is hindering my growth. (How can someone who knows everything have anything left to learn?) I'm become stubborn and set in my ways. I'm more confrontational than I used to be.
So that's why I say I'm depressed. I feel that I've really let myself down, not to mention the people who care about me and/or are forced to deal with me on a regular basis. I have to admit, that what really scares me is that, in spite of who I have allowed myself to become, I've been very "successful" to apply the materialistic understanding of the word. Life has been good, and many of the projects and ventures I've taken on have achieved their goals.
So anyway, this entry should really serve as an apology.
I want to apologize to the people who have been dealing with me as I've been going through this transformation over the past few years. I count myself extremely blessed that the vast majority of the people who have taken me into their lives recently haven't turned away, even in the moments when I've likely deserved it. If these past few years can really be deemed "successful" it's likely because of the support that I've received from all of you.
I make no excuses for the way I've handled myself recently. I can promise that I'm going to make a concerted effort to turn a corner, and be more like I remember myself being. Hopefully you'll see a new, more open, more positive, and more accepting Craig than the version of me that you've gotten to know.
Again, I'm sorry for what I've become in so many areas of my life. I've in large part lost sight of many of the Jesuit ideals that had helped me become someone who I was really and truly proud and happy to be, because of who I was, and not what I had accomplished. There is something to be said for the process of discernment. Hopefully I don't lose sight of it from here on out.
Anyone who's gotten here, thanks for reading along, and I'm sorry if my words or actions of the past few years have in anyway made you feel small, inadequate, or simply not affirmed in the way that you deserve. I owe so much to my friends, I'm sorry to those who I've let down. You will see a new Craig in the coming weeks, months, and years.
This book has a lot to say about Ancient Greek perspectives and theis meaning
but there is one perspective it misses. That is their view of time. They saw the
future as something that came upon them from behind their backs with the past
receding away before their eyes.
When you think about it, that's a more
accurate metaphor than our present one. Who really can face the future?
All you can do is project from the past, even when the past shows that such
projections are often wrong. And who really can forget the past? What else is
there to know?
I've found myself spending quite a bit of time looking back at my past, essentially with the hope for taking a toll on how I've gotten to where I am and see if I can project where it may all lead. The truth is that it's a fairly pointless pursuit, attempting to forecast or predict where you're likely to find yourself in 5 days much less 5 years.
So instead of trying to forecast, I've ended up considering who I am currently. This is where the fun starts. The truth is I realize that I've been a bit depressed. It's hard to pinpoint when exactly it started, but I'm leaning toward the end of my senior year (about a year and a half ago). I've certainly had some ups and downs and quite a few drastic life changes in that time, and have had plenty to think about. The sad truth, which is why I find myself depressed, is that in my estimation I've taken a few giant steps backward in my progression in that year and a half time frame. I have come to believe that I was a better person then than I am currently, and I must admit I find that fact extremely frustrating.
Before I go any farther into this discussion let me say that I don't in any way mean to say that I'm unhappy, or at all dissatisfied with where I am or what I've done to get here. I'm having a great time, really loving the people that I've had the opportunity to get to know and befriend, and for the first time in my life, find myself pursuing an career path that I'm really excited about and that I think is a perfect opportunity for me to link some of the extremely stratified areas of my life into something productive. I think I'm really ready to make a run here, but the past few years have been leading up to all this and that's why I've been doing all the introspection.
So here we are. I'm in a good place, surrounded by good people, enjoying what I'm doing, and really feeling that I'm "in my element" (for lack of a better, less cliche term). So why do I say I'm depressed? Well the answer is really quite simple: in spite of how well I seem to be doing, I really think I could be doing much better, mainly in the way I carry myself as a person.
I've somehow managed to get away from who I am as a person (or more accurately, who I hope to be, since as Bill Parcells puts it "what you are is what you are"). In trying to recall myself 2 years ago, I remember a very different person from the one I see in the mirror now. I seem to recall someone full of life, always positive. Someone who always saw the best in people, and tried to bring that out. Someone who could look his friends in the eye and say "I love you" without hesitation or restraint. Most importantly, I remember being a person who was focused on personal growth and who really brought something positive to his community (in many senses of the word community)--someone who had a whole lot of faith in humanity and gave a lot of trust and respect to the people in his life.
Now I'm a cynic. I've become very negative towards other people, and often find myself frustrated by how "stupid" other people can be. I've become far more sarcastic and biting than I've ever been before. Sometimes now I can't even tell when I'm joking and when I'm not. Instead of seeing the good that people bring to the table, I more and more often find myself fixated on the bad or the negative that I see. Instead of trying to improve myself and the people around me, I'm more likely to make a sarcastic remark and move on.
I've also become arrogant and conceited. I fear that I'm far too proud for my own good; that my pride has become a stumbling block that is hindering my growth. (How can someone who knows everything have anything left to learn?) I'm become stubborn and set in my ways. I'm more confrontational than I used to be.
So that's why I say I'm depressed. I feel that I've really let myself down, not to mention the people who care about me and/or are forced to deal with me on a regular basis. I have to admit, that what really scares me is that, in spite of who I have allowed myself to become, I've been very "successful" to apply the materialistic understanding of the word. Life has been good, and many of the projects and ventures I've taken on have achieved their goals.
So anyway, this entry should really serve as an apology.
I want to apologize to the people who have been dealing with me as I've been going through this transformation over the past few years. I count myself extremely blessed that the vast majority of the people who have taken me into their lives recently haven't turned away, even in the moments when I've likely deserved it. If these past few years can really be deemed "successful" it's likely because of the support that I've received from all of you.
I make no excuses for the way I've handled myself recently. I can promise that I'm going to make a concerted effort to turn a corner, and be more like I remember myself being. Hopefully you'll see a new, more open, more positive, and more accepting Craig than the version of me that you've gotten to know.
Again, I'm sorry for what I've become in so many areas of my life. I've in large part lost sight of many of the Jesuit ideals that had helped me become someone who I was really and truly proud and happy to be, because of who I was, and not what I had accomplished. There is something to be said for the process of discernment. Hopefully I don't lose sight of it from here on out.
Anyone who's gotten here, thanks for reading along, and I'm sorry if my words or actions of the past few years have in anyway made you feel small, inadequate, or simply not affirmed in the way that you deserve. I owe so much to my friends, I'm sorry to those who I've let down. You will see a new Craig in the coming weeks, months, and years.
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