Before I return to my analysis of Zen (which I'll get to in a few days' time, in a discussion of "Perspectives On Time") I want to take a moment to thank a few of my true heroes.
I love sports. Always have and always will. The thrill of victory, the agony of defeat. Poetry in motion. Do you believe in Miracles? Well I do, and I have to admit that I've recently been quite worried about the state of professional sports in America.
I'm glad to report that in the past week, all my fears have been put to rest.
In the past year, we've heard the stories of Pat Tillman, former NFL player who gave his life for his country, sacrificing life and limb (and not to mention NFL riches) for a cause in which he truly believed. More recently we've heard the stories of hurricane relief in the wake of Katrina and Rita. We've heard of the Manning brothers flying their private jet full of supplies into Mississippi (that's M I S S I S S I P P I for those of you that missed 2nd grade) to deliver food and water to families in need. Joe Horn used his cell phone to call in a favor from a few friends and went shopping for those in need, and even handed out roses to brighten a few days.
With all these wonderful things going on, you can see my cause for concern. Where were the assholes? The drunks? The abusive husbands? The Portland Trailblazers? The guys who make sports in America, so ....uh, well, American? In this country, sports have a history to uphold. From Babe Ruth to OJ Simpson to Jason Kidd--these are NOT our role models, these are our HEROES!
But fear not, American sporting public...Jason Giambi and Marcus Camby have stood up to proudly announce, "The assholes are back, and we will drag sports back into the gutter where they belong!"
So, we thank you Jason Giambi, for graciously accepting your "AL Comeback Player of the Year" Award. Now, you and I both know steroids are banned (not to mention extremely hazardous to your health) and, had you been caught (not that you ever admitted you were guilty, only apologized and asked forgiveness for your "actions"--whatever they were), you would've been suspended, at least for a little while (A very little while if the MLB Player's Union gets their way). Aside from that, however, we were all touched by your incredible comeback from a devastating self-inflicted, steroid-induced bodily failure, brought about by your desire to lie, cheat, and steal your way to the top, at any and all costs, including (but certainly not limited to) your own health. We truly, truly look up to you and the example you set. I can't wait to tell my children about my hero, Jason Giambi.
And to you Mr. Marcus Camby, we are all truly grateful. Very few of us can understand the plight of living off a meager $8 million salary. You must truly be suffering. And when the NBA annouced that it would institute a dress code for players traveling with a team, when not in uniform, I was appalled. Why should the people who pay you your outrageous salaries have anything to say about the way you dress, while repesenting their organization? After all, we love the enormous jeans, XXXXL RocaWear shirts, and remarkable "bling" that your personal style brings courtside as a result of your annual knee injury. So good for you, Marcus, for standing up and demanding what you (and all overpaid NBA players) deserve -- a stipend too allow you to afford the attire that is being so unfairly demanded of you by the league (I'm guessing you wrote off the $500,000 indoor basketball court at your $10 million mansion as a "business expense" as well) . It's bad enough they expect you to behave properly and dress professionally, but to expect you to pay for your own clothes? Well, that's simply audacious.
So thank you Mr Giambi and Mr Camby, for reminding us what professional sports in America is all about -- you. We are a nation indebted.
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Saturday, October 08, 2005
Kulturbarer
Who are we?
Where are we going?
What is the mark that our culture, and our generation will leave behind?
As a culture, we appear to be torn in opposite directions, confused, conflicted, stuck in the midst of an enormous paradox. We're obsessed with violence, war, tragedy, and chaos, while we try to lead our lives in the direction of protection, peace, security, and safety. I'm not saying anything new here; we see it and hear it everyday, in music, movies, television, and worst of all the news. We censor more and more, limiting what we allow ourselves and our children to see, hear, and be exposed to, and yet we ourselves, can't seem to turn away from it.
We shield our eyes and our bodies (we censor our fiction, create curfews, legalize unwarranted search and seizure, and pass laws about bicycles helmets and seatbelts), and yet cannot seem to resist the temptation to peak through our fingers at the all too real life horrors that life offers(be they images of the war, aerial shots of areas ravaged by hurricanes and earthquakes, or videos of a family torn down by the murder of a loved one at the corner of Peace St and MLK Blvd) and not so real dramatizations we create to mimic them. So I ask: Who are we? Where are we going? What is the mark that our culture, and our generation will leave behind?
I recently finished reading Zen and the Art of Motorocycle Maintenance by Robert Pirsig, and while I've not yet full processed the novel in order to comment on it directly (though it's certianly a remarkable book and if you haven't read it, you should), I'd like to share a few thoughts regarding the Afterword. I'll have several posts addressing the Afterword in terms of two issues it discusses. For the moment I'd like to focus on culture, what defines it, what moves it forward, and how this relates to our current situation.
Pirsig hits the mark in saying that the entire notion of a culture-barer has little American use, though it certainly should. The critical point in all this, is the recognition that culture changes; it's not a fixed entity, written in stone for all of history, constant from one generation to the next. Unfortunately, we as Americans don't tend to like the idea of a changing culture. We resist change more than we should, and in doing so, fail to understand the causes of the changes we see. We have a collective "when I was your age" mentality, and always aim to go back to the way things were before, when politicians were honest, children were safe, and elders were respected. Of course, the only way to go back is to go forward, for what other way is there?
Ok, so here we are, 200+ years after the "birth" of our country and the formation of its initial nacent culture (and by that I mean the Constistution, the notion of the American Dream, and of Democracy, and all such well and good things). So what is our culture? What is being American all about? Well, it's about upholding the Constitution (and taking prayer out of schools, or fighting to put it back it in, and the Scopes Monkey Trial, and Roe v. Wade, and the Bill of Rights) and it's about the American Dream (and the "melting pot," and segregation--both mandated and "cultural," and rising up from rags to riches, and trickle down economics, and child labor, and child labor laws) and it's about Democracy (and how it is sooooo great for everyone to have a say that we should force it on all nations around the world, without giving them a say).
So what's the point? The point is, our culture has changed and is changing and will continue to change, whether we like to admit it or not. The American Dream is not what it once was, and the Constitution doesn't necessarily mean the same things it used to (that's why Justices are supposed to interpret and not just uphold the law), and our Democracy is really a Republic, always has been, and that's probably not changing, so get used to the fact that politicians weren't honest, aren't honest, and won't be honest--we're stuck with 'em.
The question really is, how will everything that's happening right now impact our culture and in what direction will it move? Who wins the cultural tug-of-war? Do we accept all for one and one morality for all? Or do we value diversity, and personal choice? Do we continue to live in fear, on heightened alert, and try to vaccinate ourselves against every evil? Or do we open our doors and let in the good and the bad that the rest of the world has to offer, take some risks, and say "maybe there is more to living than simply being alive." What is it about life that we actually value? Are we here for nothing more than to allow our heart to beat for a given period of time (which will be as long as we can possibly manage to sustain it, by any means necessary, regardless of what the rest of our body has to say about the matter?
These are the questions that we as Americans must begin to answer, because we cannot continue the tug-of-war that we're currently in. We are a country divided, and we have to find the middle ground. But don't worry, we've been here before:
Pirsig's solution was internal. Success is the ability to connect with what you do. Success is an internal attitude toward the work you do, and the external rewards will fall inline. "Success" is a means, not and end.If you act successfully, the rest of the American dream will follow.
I think we're in the midst of a similar cultural upheaval. This time we are confronting, not success, but fear. Our current "traditional" culture tells us to protect ourselves from our fears. Don't let the external get to us: Wear helmets, label everything with warnings, don't talk to strangers, stay safe by using metal detectors and security searches. The current "rebelious" culture tells us to confront our fears head on, and defeat them. The external world can take it's best shot, we're up to the challege: Play extreme sports, watch as Steve Irwin wrestles with crocodiles and snakes, and as the contestants on Fear Factor flex their "courage," fight a "war on terror" to show them we're not afraid.
I want to offer an alternative to these attitudes. Like Pirsig, I want to offer an internal solution. Recognize that fears are internal--not an external force to be protected against or to challenge. In fact, fears are the emotional antithesis to hope. Fear is characterized by an internal focus on the negative or harmul side of what is possible. Hope is characterized by an internal focus on the positive or life-giving side of what is possible. The choice between fear and hope is and internal attitude adjustment. We cannot live without Fear, but we can also not afford to continue to be fixated on it.
Where Pirsig offered the notion of Quality of experience (you'll have to read the book for the full explanation) as an alternative to the notion that success (and failure) are external or material, I'd like to offer Choice as an alternative to the idea that fear is an external force we must deal with. We can Chose to be Fearful and Hopeless, or to be Hopeful and Fearless.
So what does this mean for our culture? Probably nothing. Personally, I'd love to see the culture shift and take on the attitude that our experience of fear is a choice. I'd love to see us focus more on our Hope for what Good we may offer as a collective whole to the rest of the world, rather than focus solely on our Fear of the Bad that the world may offer us and on protecting ourselves from it. Will we make that choice? Only time will tell.
Where are we going?
What is the mark that our culture, and our generation will leave behind?
As a culture, we appear to be torn in opposite directions, confused, conflicted, stuck in the midst of an enormous paradox. We're obsessed with violence, war, tragedy, and chaos, while we try to lead our lives in the direction of protection, peace, security, and safety. I'm not saying anything new here; we see it and hear it everyday, in music, movies, television, and worst of all the news. We censor more and more, limiting what we allow ourselves and our children to see, hear, and be exposed to, and yet we ourselves, can't seem to turn away from it.
We shield our eyes and our bodies (we censor our fiction, create curfews, legalize unwarranted search and seizure, and pass laws about bicycles helmets and seatbelts), and yet cannot seem to resist the temptation to peak through our fingers at the all too real life horrors that life offers(be they images of the war, aerial shots of areas ravaged by hurricanes and earthquakes, or videos of a family torn down by the murder of a loved one at the corner of Peace St and MLK Blvd) and not so real dramatizations we create to mimic them. So I ask: Who are we? Where are we going? What is the mark that our culture, and our generation will leave behind?
I recently finished reading Zen and the Art of Motorocycle Maintenance by Robert Pirsig, and while I've not yet full processed the novel in order to comment on it directly (though it's certianly a remarkable book and if you haven't read it, you should), I'd like to share a few thoughts regarding the Afterword. I'll have several posts addressing the Afterword in terms of two issues it discusses. For the moment I'd like to focus on culture, what defines it, what moves it forward, and how this relates to our current situation.
There is a Swedish word, kulturbarer, which can roughly be translated as
"culture-bearer" but still doesn't mean much. It's not a concept that has much
American use, although it should have.
A culture-bearing book, like a mule, bears the culture on its back. No one
should sit down to write one deliberately. Culture-bearing books occur almost
accidentally, like a sudden change in the stock market. There are books of high
quality that are an important part of the culture, but that is not the same.
They are a part of it. They aren't carrying it anywhere.
Pirsig hits the mark in saying that the entire notion of a culture-barer has little American use, though it certainly should. The critical point in all this, is the recognition that culture changes; it's not a fixed entity, written in stone for all of history, constant from one generation to the next. Unfortunately, we as Americans don't tend to like the idea of a changing culture. We resist change more than we should, and in doing so, fail to understand the causes of the changes we see. We have a collective "when I was your age" mentality, and always aim to go back to the way things were before, when politicians were honest, children were safe, and elders were respected. Of course, the only way to go back is to go forward, for what other way is there?
Ok, so here we are, 200+ years after the "birth" of our country and the formation of its initial nacent culture (and by that I mean the Constistution, the notion of the American Dream, and of Democracy, and all such well and good things). So what is our culture? What is being American all about? Well, it's about upholding the Constitution (and taking prayer out of schools, or fighting to put it back it in, and the Scopes Monkey Trial, and Roe v. Wade, and the Bill of Rights) and it's about the American Dream (and the "melting pot," and segregation--both mandated and "cultural," and rising up from rags to riches, and trickle down economics, and child labor, and child labor laws) and it's about Democracy (and how it is sooooo great for everyone to have a say that we should force it on all nations around the world, without giving them a say).
So what's the point? The point is, our culture has changed and is changing and will continue to change, whether we like to admit it or not. The American Dream is not what it once was, and the Constitution doesn't necessarily mean the same things it used to (that's why Justices are supposed to interpret and not just uphold the law), and our Democracy is really a Republic, always has been, and that's probably not changing, so get used to the fact that politicians weren't honest, aren't honest, and won't be honest--we're stuck with 'em.
The question really is, how will everything that's happening right now impact our culture and in what direction will it move? Who wins the cultural tug-of-war? Do we accept all for one and one morality for all? Or do we value diversity, and personal choice? Do we continue to live in fear, on heightened alert, and try to vaccinate ourselves against every evil? Or do we open our doors and let in the good and the bad that the rest of the world has to offer, take some risks, and say "maybe there is more to living than simply being alive." What is it about life that we actually value? Are we here for nothing more than to allow our heart to beat for a given period of time (which will be as long as we can possibly manage to sustain it, by any means necessary, regardless of what the rest of our body has to say about the matter?
These are the questions that we as Americans must begin to answer, because we cannot continue the tug-of-war that we're currently in. We are a country divided, and we have to find the middle ground. But don't worry, we've been here before:
The book also appeared at a time of cultural upheaval on the matter of materialIt is cultural upheaval that brings cultural change. In the 1970s when Zen was published, the upheaval was over the American notion of success. Two conflicting cultural forces were putting their energy into controlling external forces. The "traditional" culture controlled success by setting the acquisition of material (read: external) things as the main measure of success. The "hippies" asserted freedom as their goal, exhibiting their control over the external world by refusing to succumb to its control.
success. Hippies were having none of it. Conservatives were baffled. material
success was the American dream. Millions of European peasants had longed for it
all their lives and come to America to find it--a world in which they are their
descendants would at last have enough. Now their spoiled descendants were
throwing that whole dream in their faces, saying iit wasn't any good. What did
they want?
The hippies had in mind something that they wanted, and were
calling it "freedom." but in the final analysis "freedom" is a purely negative
goal. It just says something is bad. Hippies weren't really offering any
alternatives other than colorful short-term ones, and some of those were looking
more and more like pure degeneracy. Degeneracy can be fun but it's hard to keep
up as a serious lifetime occupation.
Pirsig's solution was internal. Success is the ability to connect with what you do. Success is an internal attitude toward the work you do, and the external rewards will fall inline. "Success" is a means, not and end.If you act successfully, the rest of the American dream will follow.
I think we're in the midst of a similar cultural upheaval. This time we are confronting, not success, but fear. Our current "traditional" culture tells us to protect ourselves from our fears. Don't let the external get to us: Wear helmets, label everything with warnings, don't talk to strangers, stay safe by using metal detectors and security searches. The current "rebelious" culture tells us to confront our fears head on, and defeat them. The external world can take it's best shot, we're up to the challege: Play extreme sports, watch as Steve Irwin wrestles with crocodiles and snakes, and as the contestants on Fear Factor flex their "courage," fight a "war on terror" to show them we're not afraid.
I want to offer an alternative to these attitudes. Like Pirsig, I want to offer an internal solution. Recognize that fears are internal--not an external force to be protected against or to challenge. In fact, fears are the emotional antithesis to hope. Fear is characterized by an internal focus on the negative or harmul side of what is possible. Hope is characterized by an internal focus on the positive or life-giving side of what is possible. The choice between fear and hope is and internal attitude adjustment. We cannot live without Fear, but we can also not afford to continue to be fixated on it.
Where Pirsig offered the notion of Quality of experience (you'll have to read the book for the full explanation) as an alternative to the notion that success (and failure) are external or material, I'd like to offer Choice as an alternative to the idea that fear is an external force we must deal with. We can Chose to be Fearful and Hopeless, or to be Hopeful and Fearless.
I'm not offering Hope as an alternative to Fear (for that is not new anymore than success as an alternative to failure was new to Pirsig's audience), but rather Choice as an alternative to slavery. Fear is not something to fight against, because if we do we fight aginst ourselves. We cannot as a people allow our fears to continue to overwhelm us and take us hostage. We must chose Hope.
This book [Zen] offers another, more serious alternative to
material success. it's not so much an alternative as an expansion of the
meaning of "success" to something larger than just getting a good job and
staying out of trouble. And also something larger than mere freedom.
it gives a positive goal to work toward that does not confine. That is the
main reason for the book's success, I think. the whole culture happened to
be looking for exactly what this book has to offer. That is the sense in
which it is a culture-bearer.
So what does this mean for our culture? Probably nothing. Personally, I'd love to see the culture shift and take on the attitude that our experience of fear is a choice. I'd love to see us focus more on our Hope for what Good we may offer as a collective whole to the rest of the world, rather than focus solely on our Fear of the Bad that the world may offer us and on protecting ourselves from it. Will we make that choice? Only time will tell.
Thursday, October 06, 2005
What's in a name?
Last night I found myself watching a painfully unfunny comedian from New York (imagine that...) who miraculously brought up an issue in his bit that has been bouncing around my head for a while now. He posed the question, "why do we feel the need to rename other countries?" For instance, why do we look at Espana, and turn around and say, "Nope, we're calling you Spain." It's an interesting phenomenon that has always puzzled me, though we as Americans are not the only culprits, and it's not always a bad thing (in China, the United States is called "Meiguo", which tranlates to "the beautiful country"--a very nice gesture, which goes a long way in explaining their obsession with photographing EVERYTHING they see!--but I digress)
This phenomenon is not limited to countries, though. We do it with people entering the country as well. I'll use my good friend Steve "The Sizzler" Andon as an example (hope you don't mind buddy). Note that his last name is Andon. As the story goes, the very first "Andon" to enter the country was Mister Andon Papasian, who was deemed to have an unacceptable name by some clown at Ellis Island, and was given the more American name (and by American, I mean the American verision of Italian) Anthony Andon ("the first shall be last and the meak shall inherit the earth...yada yada yada").
This is all well and good I suppose, but it doesn't just stop with foreign countries, or immigration officials. The question that started it all for me was in fact: When, exactly, did Cristobol Colon become Christopher Columbus? I'm fairly confident that he didn't pass through Ellis Island on his way into the not yet named America (though I'm sure it did have a name, just not one we like to write in history books), and if he did he would've received a name like "Chief Sails-In-Circles" or "Whitey Likes-the-Pipe", but certainly not Christopher Columbus.
I'm still hoping that one day we can stop the linguistic pissing contest of trying to rename every foreign thing in our own language in a lame attempt to domesticate it, and allow places, people, and whatever else to have the name that they were originally given (though I really don't know how we'll get our hands on Adam's original list)
This phenomenon is not limited to countries, though. We do it with people entering the country as well. I'll use my good friend Steve "The Sizzler" Andon as an example (hope you don't mind buddy). Note that his last name is Andon. As the story goes, the very first "Andon" to enter the country was Mister Andon Papasian, who was deemed to have an unacceptable name by some clown at Ellis Island, and was given the more American name (and by American, I mean the American verision of Italian) Anthony Andon ("the first shall be last and the meak shall inherit the earth...yada yada yada").
This is all well and good I suppose, but it doesn't just stop with foreign countries, or immigration officials. The question that started it all for me was in fact: When, exactly, did Cristobol Colon become Christopher Columbus? I'm fairly confident that he didn't pass through Ellis Island on his way into the not yet named America (though I'm sure it did have a name, just not one we like to write in history books), and if he did he would've received a name like "Chief Sails-In-Circles" or "Whitey Likes-the-Pipe", but certainly not Christopher Columbus.
I'm still hoping that one day we can stop the linguistic pissing contest of trying to rename every foreign thing in our own language in a lame attempt to domesticate it, and allow places, people, and whatever else to have the name that they were originally given (though I really don't know how we'll get our hands on Adam's original list)
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
The Syllabus
Welcome to my blog. Before charging ahead with my initial purpose, "blogging" as it were, I feel that it could prove helpful to start off with an introduction of sorts. With that in mind (and in order to hopefully establish some reasonable expectations for what you may hope to garner from this blog) I present to you "Life in the Doghouse: A Syllabus"
Important Details
In lieu of an EVite...
What: My blog
Where: Here (offmyleash.blogspot.com)
When: Whenever I deem appropriate, or more specifically, whenever you feel the urge to read it
Who's Invited: Anyone who may or may not be at all interested in anything I may or may not have to say, though some level of interest in the subject matter is both encouraged and strongly recommended.
Objectives
We perpetually find ourselves living life at the end of a very tight leash. Always struggling against societal constraints and attempting to fit into behavior patterns aligned with "normalcy" (a word created by former president Harry Truman, and resurrected recently by the ever delightful Dubya...normality is likely a more proper noun form, though normalcy has been admitted into the dictionary).
In my blog I aim to run freely about, chasing bees, cars, cats, bicycles, or my own tales--off my leash, as my URL indicates. I do not intend to be politically correct or overly sympathetic. I will not go out of my way to offend anyone any more than a dog goes out of his or her way to find an acceptable "dumping ground" (note the use of gender inspecific gramatical construction) and while I will follow the custom of changing the names and faces to protect the innocent, I will make no such promise to the guilty.
Subject matter
So what will my blog cover? The short answer is everything. I intend to make observations on life as I see it. Anyone who knows me is naturally frightened at that notion. History has shown that "as I see it" often will not jive with "How you see it," "How they see it," or "How we have come to understand that it should be seen."
In some cases this will be very positive, affirmative, and reassuring. i will often make an effort to share those things that amaze me, leave me inspired, delighted, and more alive, as well as those that simply amuse me. Other entries may be consist of constructive, critical, albeit cynical analyses of our world from my realm of experiences.
In general, I will address observations I make in places of learning--classes, lectures, churches, bowling alleys and other aporting arenas, parking garages, the mall the gym the cafeteria (or any other public places denoted by use of the article "the"), and anywhere else that my experience leads me (and perhaps in some cases, where I can only imagine my experience could have potentially led me if I had been so inclined--extrapolation, if you will). It is of the utmost importance to recognize opportunities for learning and growth at every juncture, and in every experience, not only when hunched over a tiny writing surface attached to a hard plastic seat which was ergonomically designed for some sort of large feline (a "jungle cat" perhaps) or Tom Hanks, but certainly not a typical human form.
Entries may take on any form I deem appropriate and may include but are not limited to: essay, rambling, poetic lyric, list--either ordered or disorder, alliteration, pleasantly purple power point presentation, debate, dialectical inquiry, or diatribe (which is either the act of dividing a given Native American community into 2 equal parts, or the length of the line required to do so--how these "equal parts" are to be determined, either by number, by summed competencies, by gender, or in some other fashion, may be discussed at a later time.)
Use of Parenthetical Remarks
As you have likely noticed, I enjoy using parentheses (or is it parenthesi?) in my writing. These sidenotes often can be (and likely should be) disregarded, ignored, or laughed at. They will likely induce reactions ranging from nausea, disorientation, fits of laughter, or in extreme cases, catatonic states of confusion. Read only if after discussing with your doctor. Women who are pregnant or who may become pregnant should not...oh nevermind
Grading
There will be no grading -- mostly because there's no "roster" or "roll" of any sort, but also becasue most grades are a bogus representation of your ability to utilize a restricted timeframe to regenerate your professor's views and opinions on highly controversial and often insignificant subject matter. Attendance, however, is mandatory.
Beware of Dog
As Jim Carrey once said "Before Ace Ventura, no one had considered talking through their ass." Consider this an indication of things to come. You have been warned .
In Conclusion
That covers the scope and depth of material to be covered in my blog. Again, please do not take my remarks personally and understand that if it's said here, it probably needed saying. I encourage you to offer comments, remarks, suggestions, love letters, or hate mail.
Important Details
In lieu of an EVite...
What: My blog
Where: Here (offmyleash.blogspot.com)
When: Whenever I deem appropriate, or more specifically, whenever you feel the urge to read it
Who's Invited: Anyone who may or may not be at all interested in anything I may or may not have to say, though some level of interest in the subject matter is both encouraged and strongly recommended.
Objectives
We perpetually find ourselves living life at the end of a very tight leash. Always struggling against societal constraints and attempting to fit into behavior patterns aligned with "normalcy" (a word created by former president Harry Truman, and resurrected recently by the ever delightful Dubya...normality is likely a more proper noun form, though normalcy has been admitted into the dictionary).
In my blog I aim to run freely about, chasing bees, cars, cats, bicycles, or my own tales--off my leash, as my URL indicates. I do not intend to be politically correct or overly sympathetic. I will not go out of my way to offend anyone any more than a dog goes out of his or her way to find an acceptable "dumping ground" (note the use of gender inspecific gramatical construction) and while I will follow the custom of changing the names and faces to protect the innocent, I will make no such promise to the guilty.
Subject matter
So what will my blog cover? The short answer is everything. I intend to make observations on life as I see it. Anyone who knows me is naturally frightened at that notion. History has shown that "as I see it" often will not jive with "How you see it," "How they see it," or "How we have come to understand that it should be seen."
In some cases this will be very positive, affirmative, and reassuring. i will often make an effort to share those things that amaze me, leave me inspired, delighted, and more alive, as well as those that simply amuse me. Other entries may be consist of constructive, critical, albeit cynical analyses of our world from my realm of experiences.
In general, I will address observations I make in places of learning--classes, lectures, churches, bowling alleys and other aporting arenas, parking garages, the mall the gym the cafeteria (or any other public places denoted by use of the article "the"), and anywhere else that my experience leads me (and perhaps in some cases, where I can only imagine my experience could have potentially led me if I had been so inclined--extrapolation, if you will). It is of the utmost importance to recognize opportunities for learning and growth at every juncture, and in every experience, not only when hunched over a tiny writing surface attached to a hard plastic seat which was ergonomically designed for some sort of large feline (a "jungle cat" perhaps) or Tom Hanks, but certainly not a typical human form.
Entries may take on any form I deem appropriate and may include but are not limited to: essay, rambling, poetic lyric, list--either ordered or disorder, alliteration, pleasantly purple power point presentation, debate, dialectical inquiry, or diatribe (which is either the act of dividing a given Native American community into 2 equal parts, or the length of the line required to do so--how these "equal parts" are to be determined, either by number, by summed competencies, by gender, or in some other fashion, may be discussed at a later time.)
Use of Parenthetical Remarks
As you have likely noticed, I enjoy using parentheses (or is it parenthesi?) in my writing. These sidenotes often can be (and likely should be) disregarded, ignored, or laughed at. They will likely induce reactions ranging from nausea, disorientation, fits of laughter, or in extreme cases, catatonic states of confusion. Read only if after discussing with your doctor. Women who are pregnant or who may become pregnant should not...oh nevermind
Grading
There will be no grading -- mostly because there's no "roster" or "roll" of any sort, but also becasue most grades are a bogus representation of your ability to utilize a restricted timeframe to regenerate your professor's views and opinions on highly controversial and often insignificant subject matter. Attendance, however, is mandatory.
Beware of Dog
As Jim Carrey once said "Before Ace Ventura, no one had considered talking through their ass." Consider this an indication of things to come. You have been warned .
In Conclusion
That covers the scope and depth of material to be covered in my blog. Again, please do not take my remarks personally and understand that if it's said here, it probably needed saying. I encourage you to offer comments, remarks, suggestions, love letters, or hate mail.
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